i don't know what to call this yet. all i know is that because i am proud of it and a friend gave me crazy props for it, i am starting to feel better about my life than ever before in a time when i have been feeling anything but happy. didn't think writing would ever do this to me, so i'll definitely keep doing it. i guess writing really is therapeutic like people say. this is what i wrote during the early morning hours on saturday, august 8:


once you peel back the layers and sift through the bullshit
you find something with substance hidden under the surface
you know that its special and handle it with care
knowing that most people cant see that its there
this uncanny ability to always find something good
should affect even the hardest guy in the hood
sometimes we get sidetracked no need to feel down
you are not at fault they're just playing around
at a time in life that's meant to explore
its stupid to expect something more
shallow things amuse shallow minds
a dime a dozen why waste the time
what is there to say all day
to a brain that's wasting away
intellectual? hardly, but they have no idea
you goin deeper than janet without any fear
twice as nice and giving good advice
reciprocated through the others in your life
the opportunity is there but has not been taken
a choice made by someone who is sadly mistaken
to see them happy feels good inside
at the cost of your happiness but you never cried
or ever will cry because you're used to this
yet it doesn't beat the memories of which you reminisce
they met you at your worst now its time to show your best
you got this on lock, you know you're blessed
it takes longer for some to see the value of your being
once realized no doubt you'll be guaranteeing
to one-up the masses
the knowledge you drop cant be learned in classes
just looking for them to appreciate
what you have to offer the mental state
you're one of the realest that's here to stay
only something unforgivable would push you away
you can never stay mad at them for too long
and reminders of them are in many a song
they seem to have it all together to the outside world
while preventing things inside from being unfurled
when will they take the time to look at themselves
and realize why no one might be there to help
as they continue to push people away with the things they say
no one is gonna baby them today
tomorrow or the next we'll see who's left
to pick up the pieces left behind from the theft
this is not a competition to win
just a friend asking to be let in




any thoughts?